Emotional Hunger

So I am dieting, again.

Yeah, I know.

It's a radical diet. I'll spare you the details, but it basically entails one real meal of protein and vegetables a day, and protein/fiber bars and shakes for the rest of the day. It's all supervised by a clinic, so it's safe, but it's definitely radical.

But even though I may be running the same road I've run before; the "I'm never going to fail again" road that for thirteen years has taken the "oh just this one little cheat and I'll go right back to it" detour, this time something is different.

The diet is definitely doing what it promised in that I'm truly not physically hungry. My stomach doesn't rumble, I don't feel lightheaded or faint. But I'm finding that wasn't the root of my problem in the first place.

Because even though I'm not physically hungry, I'm emotionally hungry. I miss food. Well, I miss my comfort food. I miss chocolate and bread, I miss french fries and spinach dip.

When I'm bored, stressed, angry, and sad...that's when I miss them. When I'm lonely (hard to believe with eight kids!) or in a hurry, when I'm tired or wanting a "pick me up", I long for them.

Never before have I craved those foods without physical hunger. It has really shown me how much I relied on them in my times of trouble, and it has proven to me that my life-issues troubleshooting is pretty messed up.

God doesn't tell us to turn to food when we need solace. He didn't provide food so that we could temporarily satiate our emotional problems. Matthew 11:28 says, "Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

Food is a quick fix that doesn't last. We throw ourselves into a sugar high that feels really good until we come crashing down lower than we were in the first place. We end up riding that roller coaster all day long once we climb aboard. It isn't the answer.

God is the answer. He isn't temporary. "Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal." (Isaiah 26:4) Yesterday, today, and for every tomorrow, God will be there for us. There isn't one problem we have that He doesn't care about.

We need to go to Him. When we feel that overwhelming need to eat something sweet, we need to ask ourselves why. If we aren't physically hungry, we need to fill our emotional hunger by turning to Him.

Steve went to Mexico on a mission trip a couple weeks ago. He didn't want to leave me with all the kids, but I really wanted him to go, so he went. The six days he was gone, even though I wasn't dieting yet, I consumed no sugar. Why? I told my friends that I wanted to watch eight kids for six days and in the end be able to say that I did it on Christ alone. Not because I stocked my pantry beforehand in anticipation of the stress, but because I knew that God was going to bring me through it. And He did. Despite the fact that huge issues erupted with two of our children, I managed beautifully. He got me through it, just as He promises. I saw His hand on me so clearly as I walked more than one behavioral minefield calmly and with a clear mind. And in the end I was able to proclaim that not only did I do it through Him alone, but I did it so much better than I had even imagined.

It doesn't mean we have to go sugar-free. Let's just pledge to leave the sweet stuff for what it's meant to be instead of giving it the role God should have in our lives.

I know we'll find that life is so much better.