Not a Single Hour

Last night I sat on my bed talking to myself. Over and over again I practiced my upcoming speech into the empty air of my room. The words were a mess. Ideas tumbled over and through each other, I faltered and stuttered and so many times I dropped my head into my hands and thought, "I can't do this, Lord."

I began to doubt my desire and passion for speaking. If I couldn't form thoughts in the calm privacy of my home, how would I be able to convey them to twenty people the next day?

But thinking back on my life, I couldn't find one example where God gave me the strength to do something before I needed to do it. He promises in Philippians 4:13 that, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me," but He doesn't say that the strength will come beforehand.

When I was pregnant with my third child, I worried a lot about the labor. I had two labors under my belt, and I couldn't kid myself about what I was going to experience. So for the last three months or so, I grew more and more anxious about the pain and my response to it. Having had a severe reaction to medication, I worried that I wouldn't be able to labor without pain relievers. As the due date grew closer, I became frantic. What if I couldn't do it? What if it was too much?

Then one morning I felt a series of contractions that I knew signaled that this was the day. And you know what? I was peaceful. I was serene. I took each contraction as it came, opening my body and my mind to what was happening. The pain came and went, stronger and stronger, and I never had one moment of panic. I just let it happen, knowing God was going to give me the strength to get through it.

All the preparation I did helped me immensely. The studying of natural labor methods and talking to friends who had given birth using different strategies all paid off. But the worry and anxiety was for nothing.

He gives us the strength to do all things when we need the strength to do those things.

And so at 11:00 last night, I closed my binder and turned out the lights. I had done everything I could to prepare. What would three more hours of anxiety give me? Nothing. "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" (Matthew 6:27)

And guess what? When the time came to speak, I spoke. I spoke from my heart and everything went just fine.

His timing, not ours.